DOTLAN EveMaps

A Prayer for Halp

Oh Saviour, when my wormhole is sodomised with relentless probing, when I am caught in the bubble of failure and when I jump prematurely into the gates of Derp, I pray to you for strength.

When I have left all my precious drones at home, when I have warped to zero on top of another naked man, I cry for halp.

When there is great hardship in the bowels of space and in the cacophony of alerts and emails from a dying POS I once again reach for your enormous halp.

I beg you hear my cries for halp and show me a sign, preferably before 10:30pm for that is my bed-time. I hope that you can insert your enormous shaft of light into the dark passages of my life and turn me from boy into man.

May my people be circumcised with much jubilance on the eve of the Great Fire of Auner from which we fled, to find a true home among the stars.

Amen