DOTLAN EveMaps

u'Look, we know why you\u2019re here. You spent three hours making your character look like a cyberpunk runway model, logged in, bought an expensive civilian mining laser, and immediately got tackled by a guy named xX_LootGoblin420_Xx who sent you a cheerful mail laughing at your corpse.

** Welcome to EVE. You\u2019re doing great. **

Why Suffer Alone When You Can Suffer in a Group?

Tactical Sacrifices: Be part of high-stakes fleet warfare, where your primary role is flying a 300k ISK tackle frigate directly into a wall of smartbombs to distract the enemy.

Masterclass in Bankruptcy: We\u2019ll teach you how to turn 8 hours of mind-numbing asteroid mining into 30 seconds of high-adrenaline hull breaches.

Free T1 Garbage: Our corp hangar is overflowing with poorly fitted hulls, random ammo nobody uses, and 400 shuttles left behind by people who rage-quit in 2018. Take what you need!

High-Level Strategy: Experience the sheer thrill of sitting in a fleet for two hours, watching a stargate, eating dinner, and going to bed without firing a single shot.

Applicant Criteria:

Must know how to lock a target (or at least lock the correct friendly logistic ship by accident).

Must NOT ask "is this system safe?" in chat (the answer is always no).

Willingness to double-check that your autopilot is turned off before you cry in local.

Must own at least one microphone from 2004 that picks up your ceiling fan.

"They promised me space riches and galactic glory. I currently live in an abandoned station out of a shipping container, and I\'ve never had more fun." \u2013 Surviving Recruit



Send Baama a message if you want to learn more. '